• How to Holiday-Proof Your Relationship – Part 1

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    How to Holiday-Proof Your Relationship

    Whatever the time of year, break ups are painful, heartbreaking and hard to deal with. But they’re especially devastating when they happen over the holidays. So why do relationships break down during the festive season. After all, isn’t it supposed to be a merry, jolly time full of love, peace and good will to all men?
    Well the answer is that there are actually quite a number of contributing factors. The biggest and most obvious is probably financial strain.
    Couples feel obliged to spend on luxurious, overpriced gifts in order to prove to their nearest and dearest how much they love them. Come on girls, we’re all guilty of giving purposely not too subtle hints about the presents that we just have to have, or just casually and repeatedly mentioning the pair of shoes that you happened to see, which by the way would look good with the designer dress that you tried on and absolutely cant live without.
    While this may seem harmless, fun and maybe even cute to you, you might actually be putting a lot of pressure on your partner, and although you convince yourself that a new dress is a small price for your man to pay in order to make you happy, what if that dress costs you your relationship.
    Christmas and New Year, although a time for celebration can be very stressful, and a lot of pressure is put on our partners to get everything right.
    We want them to look presentable and speak well to impress our parents at the family dinner, we want them to come across sociable and laugh along with the jokes they don’t get at our friends Christmas party, and we want them to nod in the right places and look convincingly interested when chatting to colleagues at the Christmas work do. If they don’t all hell breaks loose.
    What you have to remember is that Christmas doesn’t revolve around you. It is a time when the whole family gets together. So apart from you, your boyfriend is thinking about getting the perfect present for his sister who just had a baby, a thoughtful present for his mother who he wants to show his appreciation for and a useful gift for his grandmother who he guiltily, rarely sees. Now for us ladies not only is this very easy, it’s also fun, after all it’s just another excuse to shop. For men it’s not so enjoyable and it can actually be strenuous and exhausting. Adding pressure to your man by insisting that he do all these things just pushes him away, takes all the fun out of the holiday and can lead to a break-up.
    So how can you holiday proof you relationship, and ensure that you see it right through Christmas, soar past New Years and beyond. Here are 5 easy ways to make sure you’re not sobbing over heartbreak and comfort eating on turkey when you should be enjoying the special day that ‘tis Christmas:

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  • Love test can it help you resolve compatibility issues

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    Relationships are strange, and if you look around, you would notice that everyone at some point in life would push their limits to strike a relationship with the one they want. Once they get into a relationship, they are not quite able to commit themselves in a way, which could stretch their bond. It’s difficult to answer why humans behave in a self centric manner.

    Though, some are good at forging bonds and maintaining them, still most of them suffer from the enigma of broken relationships. That’s exactly, where dating sites creep in and guides you to choose a partner. The question at this juncture is whether a love test can help you determine whether the man or woman in your life is the right partner for you.

    Dating had always been an occasion to know more about each other, but does it actually help you measure your compatibility with your partner? Do you feel an hour date with your partner would help you create a list of her likes and dislikes, her values and goals?

    Though, few are lucky to find a partner during dates who is compatible enough and share similar goals in life. But the majorities are deprived of any success in finding a compatible partner. My love calculator is one site which guides you to find your partner through astrological calculations.

    The site does all the calculations on the basis of your birth sign, your time of birth and throws a list of options to choose from.

    Still, many would argue and set the debate on fire by saying what would happen if an astrological dating site doesn’t favor union between love struck couples. Now, nobody tells you to throw aside your relationship and put all your blame on the astrological dating site.

    The whole issue here is about your compatibility with your partner and that’s what astrological dating sites preach in their site. The calculations though may not be true always, still, my love calculator has a good strike ratio.

    Look, your desire to be in a relationship also plays a role in furthering your relationship. There’s a deeper truth in the whole debate of compatibility. The astrological dating sites only guides to choose a partner on the basis of astrological calculations, but it’s you who would make a relationship work. Your ability to accept your partner’s tastes and habits is what keeps a relationship going.

    The lack of acceptance in a relationship will kill it, no matter how much you love your partner, or the passionate romance you would have had earlier.

    There had been a surge in the number of people who are willing to measure the truth about their compatibility with their partners. It’s better to know the truth and come out of a relationship, instead of dragging on, knowing the truth that your relationship won’t work later. It would dislodge you completely, later, and break your heart.

    Remember, relationships only work when two individuals want to make it work. The astrological dating sites only guide you to find a direction, but the real commitment needs to be shown by you. It’s you who would make yourself compatible with your partner and prove what astrological dating calculations tell about you.

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  • How to tell a frog from a prince

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    There is no short cut for this. You can do so only by spending time with the guy and finding out. External appearances can be deceptive and you could get fooled into forming an opinion which could boomerang on you. It is thus better to take your time to look at some basic criteria and evaluate him on those. While there is no guarantee to anything in life, you can at least have the satisfaction of having attempted a fair assessment and not regret the decision that you ultimately take.

    Let us look at certain tips to find out how you can discover the frog or the prince in your guy.

    a)      Personal hygiene is of utmost importance and you should not compromise on this quality. Good looks though important should not be considered over good personal hygiene.

    b)      How does he speak and what manners does he show? Is he using the right grammar and do you think you will be happy listening to him through out your life?

    c)      It is always better if you are able to find somebody with a similar cultural and religious background.

    d)     Family background should also play a very important role in your decision to opt for a particular guy. When you have a loving and caring family, the chances are that your guy would have got his due share of affection and he is also likely to extend them for you and your children.

    e)      Educational backgrounds must not be very disparate. A huge difference may lead to problems later on in your married life due to issues of ego and a superiority complex coming into play.

    f)       Is he reasonably well settled in a job to provide for you? Make sure you do not go for the absolute workaholic as he may prefer to accord a much higher importance to his career than to you.

    g)      How enthusiastic is he about having children and what are his impressions about a complete family?

    h)      Do give a thought to his circle of friends and extended family. Are they well adjusted and in tune with your own temperament. If this is not the case, you could have problems going ahead.

    i)        Check out his immediate surroundings and personal effects. Does he maintain his car, desk and space well enough or he is very casual. If he appears to be very casual, then you cannot expect help from him for household work.

    What about any vices or bad habits? While everybody has them, does he engage in petty gossip or cheat on tax payments. Is he hot tempered and prefers to spend time with his friends every other night?

    The parameters are just some that you can consider and take a call. You may make a fair evaluation based on your findings and if your rating is generally positive with a couple of negative ones, you should be able to lead a comfortable marriage life in the hope that over time, you can iron out the negative attributes. After all, nobody is perfect.

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